I once took my wife to a swinger’s club in Tampa, Florida.
Oh, sure, it was strictly for research—Linda Gibson and I were writing a cover story for Tampa Bay Monthly—but there was a certain naughty rush to the whole thing. My wife Mimi and I were newly married and incredibly awkward as we entered this foreign territory and felt like we were being assessed from afar like two fresh slabs of USDA Prime veal.
DANIEL STERN podcast excerpt: “Single men are basically the lepers of The Lifestyle. The reputation of single men when it comes to behavior is atrocious. Also, most of the people who want to have all of this sex are guys and so we’re a dime a dozen. That stigma is a behemoth you have to battle.”
You can LISTEN to this interview with swinger DANIEL STERN, author of SWINGLAND: Between the Sheets of the Secretive, Sometimes Messy, but Always Adventurous Swinging Lifestyle, by clicking the audio player above!
There was no way we were going to play, as folks in the “lifestyle” call hooking up, sharing and trading partners, but I needed to see what went on behind the Swinging Door’s swinging doors.
For the record, several guys took an interest in Mimi and talked her up; no one was interested in me, apparently!
In the cause of our research, my co-author, Linda, and I were invited to attend a swingers’ house party in Zephyrhills, Florida, but I couldn’t go through with it. Linda, who clearly had more balls than I did, was the only one to experience it firsthand.
For me, daydreaming about multiple partners and random sex acts was just that—fantasy. I could talk a good talk but I didn’t have the nerve to go through with it.
And that’s the big difference between me and my guest today, Daniel Stern.
DANIEL STERN podcast excerpt: “You’re married. That’s a very different relationship than what I’m looking for in a swinging relationship.”
Stern is the author of Swingland: Between the Sheets of the Secretive, Sometimes Messy, but Always Adventurous Swinging Lifestyle. It is his first-person account of how he was lousy in one-on-one sexual relationships but a conquering hero in casual encounters with couples, wives on loan, and settings with lots and lots of strangers having simultaneous physical relations.
In addition to sharing his stories from between the sheets, Stern’s book is a how-to for men and women interested in following him into the lifestyle.
It’s a colorful, rollicking piece of work. But if you’re easily offended, or under the age of 18, this is not for you. Please stop watching or listening now. Thank you!